You’ve Never Read Funnier Amazon Reviews

Amazon is the number one e-commerce site to get your everyday needs and desires. Once you buy a product, Amazon asks if you wish to give a review. Some choose not to but others review it quick with a few words. But then there are others who go all out. Here are some of the funniest Amazon reviews that are sure to make your day.

Army Swiss Knife Transformation

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It started off regular but then things escalated rather quickly. The person who received this knife was a woman but apparently, the knife was so amazing that it made her grow a mustache. She grew it on the spot and her mom ended up fainting. I want this knife now.

Horse Mask Disguise

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This is already a mask that has gone viral a few times. Now, a reviewer has found a way to make it go viral once again. Whatever John Neal is having to hide from must be dangerous. This mask also looks a bit confusing as well because it could very well pass for a real horse head.

Wow, What An Invention

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This review should win an Oscar for best short story. The way she broke down how her marriage was in constant turmoil really struck a nerve. Simple things like cutting a banana can really make things rough. Inventions like this can really save a marriage or least put off the divorce.

What A Let-Down

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What makes this even more heart-breaking is that Shiva paid an extra amount to get the Blu-ray version. This movie called wolf, in a way and this lady fell for it. Now, we aren’t sure if she is kidding around but if she isn’t that makes this review 100 times better.

Good One

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Well, you can’t say you’re surprised. A fart joke just had to come up sooner or later and its better that it arrived sooner. The visual imagery that this review imposes on the reader is very vivid. But once you’re done reading it is hard not to laugh at it.

Should The Cops Read This?

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This sounds like premeditated murder. But we can take it as a joke only because we know how bad in-laws can be. But to try and plot her death and then make it public on an Amazon review means this mother-in-law is the all-time worst.

This Is Wild

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This one is a good mix of funny and ridiculous. And yes, we see that it did not come with any of those items he listed so that is why it is awesome to check things out before using them. To be on a camping trip and being forced to use leaves and vines to cover your tent is hilarious.

Fewer Fights

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Just like the banana slicer above, this item helped a marriage. We’re not going to go in on the problems this couple faces but we will highlight the fact that Daniel is obsessed with Dakota Fanning. Is it so bad to have a celebrity crush?

Becoming A Woman

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It sounds like this girl is in an unhealthy relationship. We hope she finds her way out (unless she likes being controlled) and she can continue to write intriguing reviews like this. The serious tone is where the humor is. Because I can’t believe that she is serious.

King Penguin

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We’re still going but we like to think that this might win as far as mask reviews go. Striking fear into your own children has to be one of the better perks. Knowing at any moment you can make someone stop asking for sweets is a power that only few have.

Gamers Know

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These days, you don’t get the full content when playing a new game. Developers always wait a while before pushing out the new updates. And when they do so, they charge users a fee of their choice. For that, this gamer is giving them a taste of their own medicine.

Protect Yourself

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Sometimes you have to go the extra mile to get a point across. SImply telling certain people not to do something doesn’t work. This guy Brian Spatz took measures into his own hands so that he could keep homeless people out of his home. Glitter can come off.

So Grim But So Funny

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This guy’s life sounds bad. Yes, people contemplate suicide often it isn’t an abnormal thing. And I’m happy that those people are strong enough to move on. And I also hope this guy is kidding but if he isn’t, hopefully, this chicken can keep him alive. This would be one crazy suicide note.

Expensive Shoes Make You Broke

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These are some pretty interesting shoes. And yes, Nike is known to sell customers overpriced shoes so part of this guys review has some facts to it. People really do have to work extra to buy a pair. But did his child really have to ask if the family is going to eat tonight?

Save A Bundle Buy A Lot

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This guy is hilarious. Notice how it starts off as something you might believe or hear people say every day. Then he just switches it on us all. Why does this watch even cost so much? Can anyone answer that? That should never be a saving number you are proud of.

What’s Going On Here?

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The backstory behind this review should be a movie. Having house ghosts leave thanks to a cat eating some seaweed extract is very interesting. This doesn’t even sound like anything you can make up. It just sounds like something I want to know more about.

Clever Review

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Whether this person is being sarcastic or not, this is great. And I like to hope that he is so pleased with the cable that he is using satire to lure in buyers. Amazon should make this the main review for customers to see when they click on this product.

Another Great Story

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People on Amazon are just great at storytelling. It might say “is joke” at the end but maybe some of it is real. This is too good to be written by someone who actually knows how to write properly. Did Nikolai ever find a job? I don’t know but he should keep writing reviews.

The Silent Mouse

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Whatever it takes to save your marriage, right? We’ve already seen to separate occasions of people trying to make things better with their significant other. The only thing here is that it might have indirectly made things worse. But he did say he was a cool guy.

Wolf Man

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If you already had this on your chest then why would you purchase it again? Anyways, I can’t imagine what the tattoo looks like or if it is even of the same quality of this shirt. But seriously, how can start with unfortunately when you know you have the same tattoo already.